Thursday, August 30, 2012


I don't know that I've ever seriously thought long and hard about the people and events described to us in God's Word. I just know they're there. Sure.....I went to Bible school. We studied them. Some of them a lot more or harder than others. And sure, there are always the people I feel I resonate a bit stronger with. The favorite people or stories. Maybe because they have similar personalities or issues or hearts or giftings. Or maybe because they're so different. Whatever the reason, I just always assume they're.....there.

Recently God's been showing me something significant. There are so many people that have lived that could've been spoken about in scripture. So many events to pick from. Even when Jesus walked the earth, He did so much and had so many conversations. We barely know about a fraction of them.

God has been teaching me lately that I need to be aware of the stories laid before me. The importance of each person talked about. Each conversation that is recorded. Sometimes I think we forget how Holy the scriptures are. How intricately God put each an every chapter of each book together. There is reason. Purpose. Knowledge and wisdom to be gained. Truths to be learned. Healing to be had. And direction to be heeded in the Word of God. What question do you want God to answer? What are you wondering about? The answer is there. Scripture is sufficient. (If you go to HSM you have been learning this from Joel!)

Along the same line, I am learning how beautiful and unique and important people's stories are today. Each person is so intimately and intricately created. Each life-each story-so different and colorful. And there is so much to be gleaned from each other in the body of Christ. So many lessons learned. Redemption to witness. Jesus at work in ways that can not ever be denied or explained away. And in the busy-ness and self-centeredness of our culture, one of the things that is decaying in our time is the sharing of stories and experiences. The close knowledge of others in the Body. The understanding of what our friends have experienced and gone through. The way Jesus uses EVERYTHING for our good and our ministry later if we only embrace Him and allow it.

I have a friend who got married young and had a very difficult road of it at first. There was a lot of heartache in the beginning of the marriage. But God reached down and pulled her and her husband out of many pits and now they have 3 beautiful daughters and minister to others, like me.

I know a beautiful woman who had her husband cheat on her while having a young daughter at home. She had a very difficult road of self-protection and providing for herself and her daughter while continuing her education. She's now walking deeply with Jesus and is a teacher. She blesses others and touches their lives every day. So does her daughter-who's now beginning another year of college. My friend and her daughter will both tell you they wouldn't know Jesus like this if things didn't happen the way they did.

One of my best friends has been living and ministering in South Africa. When she moved, she had a hard time adjusting to the differences. It was hard to be a wife and mom and minster to others all while not being comfortable. But she is so in love now she doesn't want to leave. They struggle. They aren't getting the full support they need. They currently don't have a vehicle. Yet she'll tell you the same thing-her experiences help her minister to others and bring her to a new place with Jesus.

What's YOUR story? What have you been through? What has He taught you? How is He now using something you went through in the past? In what ways has your journey made you who you are today and brought you to where you are with Jesus now? I'm seriously asking. I wanna know!!! And
share it with others. There's always something someone can glean from it.
Don't be fooled into believing otherwise.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012


You are scared.
Not many have gone before you.
This is a unique path. Not one forged many times before and definitely not one that is considered normal.
You know you shouldn't be surprised, but you are all the same.
You saw it coming. For a while, your life has been becoming increasingly crazier and more unconventional. You've been experiencing things in extremes and radicals. Things you don't even fully share with but one or two people because they'd freak many out or not even be understood at all. But things lead up to this. Special. Tender. Crazy and wild things. Those kinds of experiences that you hold dear in your heart and then smile hugely to yourself over when something reminds you.

The time is approaching. You have been preparing. Training. Waiting for this day. The day every ounce of you has been preparing for. You breathe deep. Concentrate. Focus. It's just you. No one else is there now. You and God. You take in the silence. An odd and eery peace floods you. And before you even have time to think too hard about it, you dive. Straight in. Head first. Completely in. And you move among the coolness. You may not know exactly where you are and where you're going. But you've been taught what to do. And with that knowledge, you move. You know the movements will bring you to where you need to be. And you enjoy every bit of that journey.

Monday, August 13, 2012


Yesterday pastor Rick said some things that really struck me. He talked about the Pharaohs of old. These rulers of Egypt were the most known, rich, and powerful people in the entire WORLD. In fact, they were thought to be gods. They were worshiped. And with the exception of Ramses and Tut, unless you're a history major, I can bet money you don't know the names of any of them. Am I right?

But when I say Moses or Mother Theresa, you know very well who I speak of, right? Moses had to make a choice. All the power and riches in the world as the Pharaoh's grandson, or poor and enslaved Jew? Do you think if he'd chosen the one we'd know him today? Or would his name be as fades as his grandfathers? And Mother Theresa? She didn't have a penny. She CHOSE that life. She wasn't born into it. Yet she did more for more people than we'll ever know of. And there's hardly a person alive who doesn't know who she was.

We do often think of these people as distant. We look at them and the people up front as so much different from us. We don't ever think we could be used as much as the Moseses or Billy Grahams or Pauls or Rick Warrens or Beth Moores or Kay Arthurs. But I'm realizing more each and every day that this is one of the biggest lies that emerges from the pit of hell every day. It's also one of the most common mindsets that are spread and taught today. And we couldn't be more wrong. Not only CAN God use us as much as anyone you have come to your mind right now, but He actually wants to use us MORE. Yes, more. More than we want, really. Let THAT one sink in for a bit.

I really do wonder what would happen if we actually understood our full spiritual potential and walked into it. I imagine something similar to a bomb exploding. And never-ending after effects.

Until we stop surviving and begin really living..........

Friday, August 10, 2012

What it's like.

For years, I've been terrified by the thought of being in long-term missions. I've had many fears consistently swirling around me that have stopped me from doing what I KNOW God has called me to do.

Yesterday, I was telling someone about the stuff God's doing in my life. And In the middle of the conversation, I heard Him whispering "Aye! Do you see it? Do you feel it? Do you realize it?" and my spirit immediately replied "Oh. So THIS is what it's like. Woah." and I was frozen with awe. You see, as I was explaining where God's headed with me yesterday, the fear I've experienced my whole life was absent, the biggest sense of peace I've ever known was in it's place. The uncertainty of God providing any and everything I need was missing, and confident faith that He can do what he says He can do was pouring out of my mouth. And the unsettled and uncomfortable feeling of having a life that is weird and different and isolated and not understood or able to be related to was completely dissolved. In its place was an unquenchable desire to have that very life and a knowledge that I will only be happier and more in love every day from here on out.

This is what it's like to follow Him. Ridiculously happy. Unbelievably wild. Exceedingly hilarious. And in the depth of it all, peaceful beyond understanding.

I don't care who or where you are. Don't settle for less that that.
You have no reason to.

Monday, August 6, 2012


I'm feeling particularly blunt this evening. The truth is, I struggle deeply with self image and comparison. Oh, I hate that I have to admit that. But it's true. Maybe it's upbringing. Maybe it's having gone through cosmetology school. Or T.V. Or magazines. Or jumping into the fitness world. I think it's all the above. Whatever causes it, at times it tries to eat me alive. And I admit that a large amount of the time I just about let it.

I could go into all the detail of what I've been painfully fighting with in this area. But I think I can make my point without doing, I experienced something that was a wonderful reality check for me. I saw an example of how a group of people I am usually envious of and desire approval from spend their every waking moment and ounce of energy on living for the next big event. Some of them were online talking about next year a day after arriving home from THIS year's
Shindig. As I noticed this, a very real truth stuck out to me. I could allow myself to jump back into that 100%. In fact, part of me desperately wants to be more a part again of this group of friends and all they do. However, I know my calling. My purpose. And it's not the same thing. It's not of that world. Rather than be upset over not being as "wanted" by this circle as I'd like, there's a goal to delight in. An eternal one. I don't totally have peace yet with myself as I am. Apart from the title I once had. But seeing the focus and obsession of others over something that will eventually fade tells me to stay on this path. Even-and maybe ESPECIALLY- when it's uncomfortable and uncertain and makes me give up something I think I want so badly. The truth is, in the long run, wanting to be where HE is is all that will matter and last.