If you're anything like me, the answer to that question can change drastically daily. Sometimes even between the alarm clock and lunchtime. Life is lived in mountains and valleys. We rarely stay in one place, right? Some of us rarely stay in-between those two extremes. We have big, massive, life-changing moments and we have deep, dark, "everything is dreary and it's never going to get better" days. Seasons. That's not just for the Earth. That's how life is too.
Do you ever feel a nagging feeling that maybe-just maybe-you will never feel the power of the "mountain-top" moments again? Do you wonder how you could have experienced so much excitement and overflowing joy at one point only to be struggling now just to have something to care about today? And what about the in-between? It all feels kind of messy sometimes, doesn't it?
I awoke this morning from a dream in which I was coming home. This doesn't surprise me because I have plans to move home in a month but have been wrestling with it. I love the people I work with and they're intensely amazing. I hate to leave that. But as I woke up this morning with visions of being home, seeing everyone again, loving on them, diving into the community, I began to cry. Yes, I miss it terribly. Yes, I want to reconnect. Yes. How do we deal with all the excitement and pain thrown into the pot? How do we deal with unknowns? With transitions? With the un-expecteds? With dreams not coming to fruition? And with carrying our mountain-top experiences with us rather than leaving them on top of the mountain?
Several things popped into my mind. They helped. They reminded me. They speak:
1. It takes deep pain to recognize the joy of healing.
(Those who has hurt the most will have the most to be overjoyed about. )
2. If you don't feel anything get low. Literally. Hit the ground and ask for it.
3. When you don't have words or know what to pray, speak His words to Him.
(There is a unique power that come with praying His words out loud to Him.)
3. When the last thing you feel like is praising Him, make it your first response.
(The walls will crumble. Your soul will awaken and respond. )
4. Turn off the noise and turn your eyes from you to loving on someone else.
(You'll begin to hear and understand Him in ways beyond what you thought. )