Africa update.

Today, things changed. As you may know I have been very excited about all that Agape has been doing in Kenya and I've been working towards a trip to check it all out.

Today I found out that there are some delightful new missionaries coming to work with Agape. Decisions are needing to be made about who will be where and doing what and when.....logistics. In the process of all that is happening, it looks like there just may not really be a need for me long-term at this time- something my heart has been wondering about and considering. They have welcomed me to still come for a short-term trip, and I have gladly taken them up on the offer. I know that no matter WHAT the future holds, I will glean wisdom and learn valuable lessons to take into the future.

I will be going to Kenya from June26-July13th. I trust The Lord has some incredible plans. Please be praying for the the trip as well as the future. My heart does indeed ache to serve long-term in Africa. Somehow. Somewhere. And soon. Thank you to all who've been such an incredible support.

alertness.

If in my head I quickly list some of the people I believe to be extraordinarily powerful and influential, I come to a disturbing discovery. Almost every person who's been called to a deeper and crazier life, a life of teaching and equipping others, has at least one loved one who suffers from some form of life-controlling addiction or battles some form mental instability and hardship. As I think of all my favorite pastors, missionaries, teachers, speakers, authors, musicians, and friends who are in the trenches of a foreign country working endlessly on behalf of the kingdom, I can list what almost all of those people's families deal with. On pretty intense levels. Now, maybe this is just coincidence and the truth is that a large majority of families today happen to be dealing with these issues. But to me it seems like there just might be someone roaming around, hungry, looking to devour. And I think this lion is pretty smart. So I think we need to be smarter. More aware. In tune. In prayer. This is a bloody and messy battle. He goes after those who have influence because they're a threat to him. We need to get more dirty and be in the trenches with each other way more often. Let's stop trying to make our lives look so grand on social media and just be raw and real and honest. Can you imagine what would happen if we talked about what was REALLY going on rather than our political agendas and opinions and pictures of our lunch or walk? Revolution would happen. Fresh, healing, unique, irresistible changes would take place. People wouldn't stay far away from worship on Sundays because they'd no longer fear hypocritical Christians and their judgement against them.(Did you know that's the #1 reason people don't attend a worship gathering?)And this world would not be able to deny the wave of Jesus that would be crashing down every bit of every one of the enemy's strongholds. A Tsunami of radical young people unlike anything seen before. Taking this world by storm. Who are some of your favorite influencers? Let's begin praying faithfully over their families. Over THEM. Standing boldly in truth without being deceived isn't easy.

This spot.

I recently was made aware of the fact that I'm actually EMBARRASSED by a lot of what my life looks like right now. A few former employees of one of my jobs asked me "you still working THERE?" with a sarcastic laugh. That made me really begin to become bitter against a whole array of things. And want even more than ever to get into a new stage. A new place. With new everything.

As I mulled this over for a while, I realized something important. I have been treating everything about this stage of my life as if it's just that. A stage. Nothing more. Something I have to put up with until things get better. Until Jesus lets me move on.

Then I was severely convicted yesterday. During a conversation with a co-worker who doesn't know The Lord, I was told that I am different in a way that makes her think about Jesus. And I realized in a flash that I am the only piece of Jesus she knows at this point. The responsibility and honor of such a situation is something that I most certainly don't want to just "put up with."

So I'm on a mission. A mission to become passionate about wherever I may be in this moment. Even if it's the last place I WANT to stay. Even if others think I'm a loser because of where I work and what I'm doing and how it's not "successful."
We can fall flat on our faces and passionately pray over any spot we find ourselves in. Like it or not. And that is precisely what The Lord WANTS from us. Perhaps I am stuck where I am just to learn this important lesson. A lesson we should all learn.

Because of.

I used to feel as if God doesn't answer or walk with people through things sometimes. If I didn't see someone experiencing deliverance in a tough situation, I sort of assumed He wasn't involved much. But thanks to Miss Beth I have been understanding a lot more lately about how God delivers. In any situation, there are 3 likely scenarios:
1. God may deliver us FROM it
2. God can deliver us IN it.
3. He can deliver us THROUGH it.

Say I get cancer. He can deliver me FROM it with healing me completely. IN it by healing me over time with chemo and radiation and doctors. Or THROUGH it by welcoming me with open arms into my new home and body. In all scenarios, He's delivered me. (BTW.....I believe there are countless times we're delivered FROM things and never even know what He's spared us from!)

Take Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. When Darias ordered them thrown into the fire, God could've easily stopped any part of the operation and delivered them completely from the flames altogether. But He didn't. Instead, they were thrown in and survived, coming out without so much as a scratch. I've often wondered if they were to come out unharmed why they had to go INto the fire.

Taking another look at it, I see that during their time in the fire, they had a protector join them and walk among the flames with them. Many historians believe that this could indeed be a pre-incarnate Jesus Himself. And when they emerged, scripture says not a hair on their heads was singed, but the bonds that had once been around their hands and feet were turned to ash. Yes. BECAUSE of the fire.

So, you see, when we and up having to walk IN the middle of a trial, it may be a whole lot better of a scenario than we imagined. We just may get to walk side by side with Jesus, have some bondage burned right off in the process, and remove from the fire unscathed.

That dreaded word.

It leaves a bad taste in the mouth. It causes the most pleasant of people to become short and snappy. It can be the factor between two very similar people that causes one of them to be extremely wise and effective. The world doesn't understand it. The church has lost their knowledge of what it means. Our culture has deleted it from it's vocabulary.
Wait.
Ick. It lingers unpleasantly, doesn't it? I've been hating the fact that this word is popping into every devotional I pick up, every message a pastor speaks, every book I'm reading, most of my conversations, and even a majority of the songs that come on the radio. I clearly see that The Lord is commanding it of me, but I've been grumbling all the same.

I boldly asked Jesus the other day why I must wait any longer. And then? I logged onto my Bible and this was waiting for ME:

The one about Dance.

Since my earliest memories, I've always loved the art of dance. I find it deeply moving and beautiful. My grandmother used to take me to the ballet, and for years I'd fall asleep every night listening to The Nutcracker while playing all the scenes in my head. Pretending to be Clara. However, I've spent most of my life overweight and sitting at a piano. Dance was one of those things I would admire and long for from afar as I pounded out Beethoven's fifth.

Recently, a renewed or re-discovered passion for dancing has been a huge part of my life. I'm not sure if it has to do with instructing Zumba or not, but I have longed almost more than ever to be a dancer. To study and learn the art. Modern. Ballet. Even ballroom. And for the first time since being very young, I have finally become fit enough for this to be possible.

Last week, I was feeling particularly down about wanting to take classes but having a lack of time and finances. I was venting about this to Jesus, knowing He understands my emotions more than even I. I told Him my heart hurt because I just wanted this so badly.

The next day, as I was leaving the gym, a lady who's in Zumba with me caught me in the parking lot. She told me "I just wanted to tell you that I really enjoy watching you dance during Zumba. When you free-style, you have such rhythm & natural movement. And you love it. I don't know what dance background you have but it's beautiful." I couldn't believe what she was saying. I had to choke back tears as I realized that Jesus was showing me that in His way-not mine-He's always answering my prayers. Just because it doesn't look a certain way doesn't mean He's not doing something incredible. Or caring about what matters to us. We just need to stop insisting that it all look as we want and see how much better He paints it to be. Open eyes. Open heart. Look.

My name is Elisabeth.

One of the small groups I'm in is reading an amazing book called Godspeed. Last week's chapter spoke a great deal about how we so often stigmatize people. In our mind, We place them in a particular group of people. This agitates me to no end. And I think the church does this almost more than the world sometimes.

My friend Kate's family recently spent a year in Kenya working with Agape. She says she's now in the "missionary" category. When she runs into someone she knows, she doesn't get asked questions any other 17 year old would. Most of the time the response is "Hey, you're that chick who was in Kenya. So how's Africa? That's what you do, right?" No. She doesn't do that. She's a teenager who works and plays and loves and is looking at college. But people don't ask her about that.

I too often don't feel "known." When people approach me, they constantly say "Liz the clown! How's the clowning world?" Or "Hey. You still teachin' Zumba?" And there's always "So, got another trip planned to Disney?" While I do love these things, they aren't me. They aren't my deepest passions. They don't make up some of my largest enjoyments, desires, & talents. But it's not too often others take any time to learn about the rest. So in their minds I am a clown. A fitness nut who spends all my time at the gym. Or a Disney freak who talks about the parks all day. Okay. Maybe that last one's happened. But still........I'm much more than the categories people often place me in. Those things always get tacked onto my name as if they're part of my identity. But I'm not those things. My name is Elisabeth.

We don't take time to get to know some of the other things that may be important to someone. We simply see something about them and place them in a category. Let's take more time to listen to each other's lives.